I hate this video. I hate it. When I started recording my masturbation practice I posted nearly unedited film but I was careful in my filming. And I only turned on the camera when feeling pretty. My goal was a realistic depiction of me, and I carefully avoided editing much to keep myself on the straight and narrow.
Then I got into artsy edits, multiple perspectives and felt I was staying true to a genuine portrayal of me but without the dogged adherence to exactly what happened, for how long and in what order.
This week’s Masturbation Monday is also the first footage I’ve had edited by someone else. He left in little gestures, quiet moments, waiting, breathing, hesitation, comments. I feel more naked watching this since probably my first video. It’s not comfortable. I don’t like the thousand flaws in myself that I see in this, and it wasn’t my hand there to mitigate my imperfections.
But in the name of honesty, and all other dastardly things, I post this despite hating feeling naked and imperfect in the extreme.
I hereby issue you a formal invitation to skip to minute 18 where I start putting my nipple clamps on my pussy.
For all the parts that aren’t perfect, the camera angle around minute 22, with anus and wet dipping fingers.
That angle, that shot, is glorious. It make the humiliation of all the rest worth it.