Shame is not a static state. It comes and goes in waves. One moment we may be perfectly fine with wanting money, sex or attention; the next we are mired in self-loathing, doubt and anguish.
Everyone holds contradictory beliefs about themselves and their place in the world. Some of my most painful contradictory beliefs were about my sexuality. I expected myself to be sexy and pure at the same time. That expectation lashes us to pain. It sets up a dichotomy; sexy and unsexy; pure and impure. These are false. I am a sexual being. I am the definition of sexy. I am a human being, both pure and impure, always and in every capacity. My sexuality when I’m not fighting my contradictory beliefs about it, is one of the most beautiful aspects of my being.